03 May 4705 - My Dream Job

Strictly speaking, my dream job is to be the voice of a cartoon character, probably a villain or monstrous henchman as my heroic sounding voices are all either painfully painfully ironic or bravado, or don't sound whiney enough.
On Saturday, though, I get to pretend for eight hours that it is my job to design and build Magic decks and play in tournaments against others for dollars.

There really is a profession for this, and the only thing keeping it from being my dream job is that I don't see it as a legitimate job.

At all.

Really, I hate the guys who have printed on their pro-player cards that it's their goddam job to be good at a child's card game, and have much respect for the ones that say "student at wherever" or "software engineer" under the career heading. So my dream is not so much to have that as a job, but to be great at it as a hobby. To be renowned, and esteemed among teens, maybe even a hundred.

Specifically, there's a tournament in the Richmond Convention Center this weekend that I shall attend. Wish me luck.

That also means that I may be a little...erm...edgey tonight. In fact I remember it, so I apologize in advance.
I know it sounds weird, but I will not have had meant it when it happens. Also I'll forget to apologize after, so I'm clearing it out of the way now. Sortof. See, I'll remember this and someone or maybe I will direct you to it and you'll say that it's bullshit, that it's just bullshit and I am typing it now or recently and that the timestamp is easily faked. Also how can I be sorry for something I'm going to do, why not simply stop yourself from doing it in the first place?
To be fair, we could extend this reasoning to the nature of all apology. If you were really that sorry, then you wouldn't have done it.
This is an unhelpful mentality, no matter when it happens, and that's not what you're trying to get out of me. What you want is impossible, but my reading this aloud should be a good runner-up to that.
I can also back that up by giving you a good night's sleep. I used to do that more often for people, but then they stopped asking and I got lazy and they did well enough on their own anyway. But sure, I can clear out your dreams of invaders, probably when I'm asleep, too.

I mean, I'll pretty much have to.

It's my dream job.

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